I've also been getting used to the idea that life is going to continue and nothing is going to stand still and wait for me to get back. I've had a few conversations with my mom and other people about how I'm worried that something bad is going to happen while I'm gone (I've got a pretty bad track record with being out of town when family dogs die-- knock on wood). But the thing I have to realize is, whether I'm here or not, it still would have happened, so would it be better to be there when it did or to be away? I don't know-- maybe being away would soften the blow...so maybe that's a good thing.
But besides having potential disasters running through my head, I'm also teaching myself to accept the fact that people are going to keep doing what they're doing, despite my absence. It feels pretty self-centered to even say that I would have thought that everyone would stop what they were doing for 6 months, but that's not really what I was thinking. I just never really considered the fact that things could change dramatically; my friends at Emerson are moving into their own apartment off campus; my sister, A, is going to move to Missouri with her boyfriend; my parents might rearrange the house!! But the fact is, me being gone doesn't change the fact that those things are going to happen, and, although I'm kind of putting my own life (as it is here and now) on hold, no one else could possibly be expected to do that...unless, of course, they were going to sail around in a fishing trawler for 6 months I guess.
Anyway, it's weird to think about missing things. I don't want to miss anything, but that's impossible. The good thing is, they have a satellite phone on the boat, so if someone really needs to tell me something, they can leave a message at the boat's onshore office and I won't go more than 24ish hours without hearing about it (because they do check their messages).
So that's that. You won't be hearing from me on this blog for quite a while. Actually, it might be never again- I don't know. Because I may start a new blog. But don't worry- I'll let you know. Bye for now!
|The tree is is a metaphor...get it?|